problem says i cant
problem says i should take some for myself
problem says im not broken enough

im going to prove that problem is right

i dont care

sue me

i dont care less

i dont bother to

they kissed and lived happily ever after

for a guy to grumble more than a girl
and for that same guy who pushed the girl away because she's making him grumble
you failed big time

does it matter?
shakes head.
it doesnt.

crocodile tears as they call it
i dont understand why it depends so much on the situation
i dont understand why certain words or phrases said can make me cry like a baby
but when it changes direction
my heart stones
wrong of me
to shut off to so many things
yet leave a few self selected channels open
because these few i-thought-hopeful channels are those
that will just slam the door right when i needed to go through

leave me alone
to dream of my prince charming
to dream of the shadow of his back and his neck and his hair

leave me alone
to let me heartbeat fall into the same pace as his
to feel the fuzzyness when he gaze at me

leave me alone
to melt in his actions and words
believing that till today its still alive and living

leave me alone
to indulge in my memory
of what it should be

leave me alone
to be mesmerized by his masculinity
yet at the gentleness that he shows when he's with me

leave me alone
to dream of what i was so sure it would be
of the lost dream that i lost because of me

leave me alone
as i trace my fingers upon his picture
remembering the feelings that was there and might still be there

leave me alone
in my girly fantasy
where it would never be just you and me

You don't like this?
It's fine.
You don't want this?
You look great
But you don't want me.
I'm just not in the mood.
It's our honeymoon, Jean Marc.
Holly, I can't.
Why not?
He says nothing. Why not? I shout.
Because I don't love you that way.

black hole
i wanted to leave you
but that feeling wasnt strong enough to pull me out
so now im sinking back in
somehow
i feel comfy
even though it feels drowsy

how can i walk away from all i once knew
promises i held on to
who am i kidding
who am i fooling
into thinking i cant live like this

cant keep on running away from you
cant go on living this life im in
letting it all go and im turning around
i hear you calling me so im running back to you

a angel by day a devil by night
dont know who i am anymore
so very confused and so conflicted
i just cant take this anymore

altered frequency - exalt- running back to you

problem started since these incidents and has never ended
problem is still growing
problem is causing me to run
problem is causing me to not believe
problem is causing me to not know how to trust or who to trust
problem is making me not want to have anything to do with problem
problem is causing me to feel obligated to go for activities
problem is causing me to look at those them from a different more negative perspective
problem is making me turn into a monster
problem is making me enjoy becoming a monster
problem is making me into a totally different person

away
away
and further away

drifting with the water
feeling the pain of sharp objects poking into me once in a while

picking up pace when others are running and dashing
trying to keep on par with the rest
but somehow i know i will never reach the end
because my path has been blocked

female cycle in full scale affecting all those in same category
those of the same size

sue me for having behavioural problems
i dont care

he bought a tin of chocolate wafer because i said i always get hungry at night after dinner and he remembers i like chocolate
he bought me this whole huge packet of prawn crackers because i cried yesterday due to the shock
he came to see me because he wanted to see me even though it is raining heavily
he is the sweetest and still is even though it has been such a long time we've been together
apuchi. thank you.

but today i know i failed
because whether i like it or not
i've picked it all up without realising
since young till now

i need a job badly
know of any part time sat thing?

back alive and active once again in sg long

joy of not having to live in condemnation anymore

been sick
been numb
been lost