filtering what is heard.

drama days as how he calls it. i do thank god for the young and reckless teenage days which i proudly say had formed part of what i am today.

the people, the events, the emotions. the occasions. the observation.

is the end outcome important? maybe, but i guess not as important as the whole process.

intentions

intentionally touched and rubbed her hands with his hands. why? to take advantage of her? she stared at him, he let go saying sorry superficially.

jerk.

so what if he's hot and charming or so he thinks? so what if people go for his classes because they have silly crushes on him? so what if other girls willingly allow him to touch them and giggle their heads off when he does that?

jerk.

intentional? yes i believe so.

its another bad missing day. emotions are meant to be vented.

telling myself to take charge of time given to me.

having a business model presentation this saturday in city harvest. got into the semi finals with yunnyuan as my teammate.

its a clumsy day. i keep spoiling other people's properties when i use them. no good no good.

and i keep spilling my food. oh dear. butter fingers.

been having some weird chills from time to time. it can get rather scary sometimes. but the peace comes when i pray in jesus name against that feeling. its interesting to see god's power. =) many spiritual things happening around, but i do believe that all things do work out for the good of those who love Him. and all things happens for a reason.

God is real. =) i proudly testify that.

current craving:satisfied

im going to miss him. he came all the way from penang because i wanted to see him. how much sweeter can he get?

each hour is precious. i thank god as i count the number of hours we had together.

current craving: fried food

2 Corinthians 4:7-18 (New International Version)

7But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 10We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. 11For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. 12So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.

13It is written: "I believed; therefore I have spoken."^[a]With that same spirit of faith we also believe and therefore speak, 14because we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus from the dead will also raise us with Jesus and present us with you in his presence. 15All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God.

16Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

current craving:ying yong

And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity
Colossians 3 : 14

the thought that came about was on love. everyone deserves love. everyone yearns for love. the only difference is the source of love, some yearns for love from their parents, some from siblings, some from relationships, some from religions, some from peers, some from any source

but the underlying issue is we all need love. we all want love. but many times we think of the context of love only within those around us. like our peers, or people we see. the question here is what about those who we perceive to be undeserving or people that we neglect to notice?

im talking about the underprivileged, the sick, the poor, the beggars, the prostitutes, the abandoned, those suffering from natural disaster. do they not deserve love too? or even more love because of what they are going through?

current craving:agar agar

he came and left again. this time it was for about 48 hours in total. =) back to waiting and anticipating and living out each other's lives to the fullest until we meet again.

current craving:vietnamese fried spring rolls

i wonder if being ignorant till the extend of being disliked is something that unnoticeable or is it just plain 100% ignorant even at the expense of others sacrificing for you all the time?

current craving:

Isaiah 25:1-9 (New International Version)

Praise to the LORD

1 O LORD, you are my God;
I will exalt you and praise your name,
for in perfect faithfulness
you have done marvelous things,
things planned long ago.

2 You have made the city a heap of rubble,
the fortified town a ruin,
the foreigners' stronghold a city no more;
it will never be rebuilt.

3 Therefore strong peoples will honor you;
cities of ruthless nations will revere you.

4 You have been a refuge for the poor,
a refuge for the needy in his distress,
a shelter from the storm
and a shade from the heat.
For the breath of the ruthless
is like a storm driving against a wall

5 and like the heat of the desert.
You silence the uproar of foreigners;
as heat is reduced by the shadow of a cloud,
so the song of the ruthless is stilled.

6 On this mountain the LORD Almighty will prepare
a feast of rich food for all peoples,
a banquet of aged wine—
the best of meats and the finest of wines.

7 On this mountain he will destroy
the shroud that enfolds all peoples,
the sheet that covers all nations;

8 he will swallow up death forever.
The Sovereign LORD will wipe away the tears
from all faces;
he will remove the disgrace of his people
from all the earth.
The LORD has spoken.

9 In that day they will say,
"Surely this is our God;
we trusted in him, and he saved us.
This is the LORD, we trusted in him;
let us rejoice and be glad in his salvation."

Long before the discovery of penicillin, other silent killers were at work saving lives by destroying bacteria. These silent killers are white blood cells. These hard workers are God’s way of protecting us from disease. No one knows how many invasions they have stopped or how many lives they have saved. They receive little recognition for all the good they do.

The Lord gets similar treatment. He often gets blamed when something goes wrong, but He seldom gets credit for all the things that go right. Every day people get up, get dressed, drive to work or school or the grocery store, and return safely to their families. No one knows how many times God has protected us from harm. But when there is a tragedy, we ask, “Where was God?

how can a person say "i know and i understand" unless that person went through the same or similar situation?

and if that person has not, based on what does he or her say "i understand"?

by just being mere listeners, it doesnt give the same experience as the personally going through the whole experience from beginning to the end.

no, in the end, it will stay as a personal experience, unable to be expressed through words.

current craving: meatballs

honesty

being true to yourself?

being honest to others?

hiding behind a mask?

and after some time, tiredness comes in, because its not the real person. the real person is bursting to burst out, but the outer person stops the inner person from showing. and that takes up a lot of energy. when the energy runs out, tiredness comes in.

If there were no words
No way to speak
I would still hear you

If there were no tears
No way to feel inside
I'd still feel for you

And even if the sun refuse to shine
Even if romance ran out of rhyme
You would still have my heart
Until the end of time
You're all i need
My love, my valentine

All of my life
I have been waiting for
All you give to me
You've opened my eyes
And showed me how to love unselfishly

I've dreamed of this a thousand times before
In my dreams i couldnt love you more
I will give you my heart
Until the end of time
You're all i need
My love, my valentine

La da da
Da da da da

And even if the sun refuse to shine
Even if romance ran out of rhyme
You would still have my heart
Until the end of time
Cuz all i need
Is you, my valentine

You're all i need
My love, my valentine

faces

faces of different people at different occasions shows different emotions and expressions
learning to cope with the changes in faces

second chances

if people screw up, do they get second chances? and if they get second chances, will it be the same as the first chance they get? what will the society think of them or that particular person? what will be their lives like being the talking stock of the society. and if they do get second chances, is it worth it? is it worth it to go through all the struggles? its kind enough to have people who gives second chances, and still talks good about you. but in the end, the guilt and the consequences, is it worth bearing? or would it be a better choice to just live in self suffering in a secluded place, away from people, away from gossips?

its a happy day!! coz god made this day... there's this sunday school song.. not sure if you've heard it before.. it goes something like that

It's a happy day
and I thank God for the weather
It's a happy, happy day
and I'm livin' it for my Lord
It's a happy day
and things are gonna get better
Cause I'm livin' each day with the promises in god's word.

reminds me a lot that.. god made our days... and we should be glad.. and rejoice with the moment.. not sulk when things are down.. for the joy of the lord is my strength.. =)