phew!!!

2 papers down....one more to go....

college life was where i thought i could run away from all troubles and messy thinking that feelings and relationships could bring... i brought along this innocent, naive way of thinking as i entered this college and mixed with people that im hanging out with.... i didnt want to think of any more relationships or feelings or anyone else....its not the time yet...i know i have to wait patiently
i brought along the hurt and pain too, with the hope that time and distance will nurse this broken heart... true enough, here in college, i found GOD again, different from back home because the feeling i have now is so child like, no worries, just placing all my hopes and plans for the future to HIm...
and now...its like digging back the memories.... i dont blame him for asking me and bring out the memories that i had, nothing to do with him...sometimes i kind of pity him also... why ask me, poor thing, im such a cold blooded, no feelings girl...at least for now, i've got no plans to open up...
its not easy to get me to open up....im so hard inside..
what am i to do? its like bringing back the feelings? i dont want to feel anything... its detrimental... will i fall for him? i dont know...maybe if i've known him for a longer time... but one thing for sure is that even if i do one day, my feelings will be kept in me..... nah, dont think that will actually happen.... too hard...

hard to find out what i actually am...
introvert or extrovert?
i am easily influenced but yet at the same time, i hold so strongly to my stands....quite stubborn sometimes
noisy and quiet?
think a lot and yet say the stupidest stuff because i dont think enough?
weird
haha

i need to sleep...
have been sleeping for about 3 hours a day since last week
exams are killing me
the paper just now, social psychology was bad
am not going to think about the results...
everything that i get, i iwll take it as a blessing from God

went to loren's church yesterday. city harvest church
they are loud..haha...it was cool, really cool, the approach, was so youthful
and their pastor is only 30? thats so young
most of the people there are around 20... really young batch of people
i found them really friendly though.... felt quite welcomed there
then after church yesterday, i went to jr to study
whiskers pooed on the floor..... terrible girl... but she can recognise her name now..hha...
one super duper cute, innocent looking kitten that i am so going to miss when i leave